I stupidly looked at an old scrap book I had lovingly put together, containing photos of a holiday in Tenerife with my first boyfriend. And if I may say so, I looked pretty damn good: no wine-induced ruddy complexion, no bags under the eyes and not an ounce of fat on me. But then hey, I was 18 years old, 20 years of aging and two kids does a lot. The sad thing is though, at the time I genuinely thought I was fat.
After looking at these photos of me frolicking in bikinis, coming down water slides, jumping from rocks and floating on li-los, I felt positively depressed. At least I was doing something about it I reasoned.
Slimming World say that you can eat as much pasta, rice, noodles and potatoes as you like - so I took them at their word and really went to town on my carb portion sizes this week, but boldly cut right back on my alcohol, chocolate and bread intake. I felt I had worked hard at it, and was very proud of myself, but did wonder whether all those lovely carbs were too good to be true... and they were. I was weighed yesterday and had only lost a mere 2lbs. My mum tried to cheer me up by saying: 'at least you didn't put on 2lbs - you are going in the right direction'.
She is of course right, I am going in the right direction, but boy do I find it hard to shift the pounds now that I am older. Five years ago I only had to look at a stick of celery and the weight would come flying off within seconds.
And it doesn't offer that much inspiration when the Slimming World 'Consultant' at my local group, who boasts to having been a member for 9 years, is very very large.